As of lately

Look at this new toy! Paul and I have been talking about getting a camera for a long time. We finally did our research and got a really good deal on this guy. We having so much fun playing around with this. Definitely taking some getting used to but the pictures are so much better than those blurry I phone pics. 

 I am so puppy hungry. Not baby hungry.  PUPPY HUNGRY. I want a pup sooo bad. Of course I have my Molly dog at the parents house (oh do I love her so) but she is just a little nut case. I could never have her in an apartment. I dunno what it is but I have the extremely soft spot in my heart for all fluffy living things. Like, even a picture on facebook will get me "awww"ing and "oooo"ing. I make Paul take me to the local animal shelter every week to see and play with the doggies so that makes me happy.

 Speaking of soft spots.. this little boy has me wrapped around his tiny little greasy finger. I always look forward to my Mondays and Fridays where I can go to my sisters house and tend this boy and his little sister. Seriously. The cutest kids alive. 

Matilda, our pet scorpion, died a couple weeks ago. Those little pinchers.. they will be missed. kinda. But props to this little insect for living in a piece of tape for 2 months while transferring her from Arizona to Idaho (I'll have to tell that story another time).

We've been working hard at our baking skills. Especially muffins that come out of a box. See those cupcake holders? They aren't just an old cupcake holders. They are made of silicone which makes them reusable. Saving trees one cupcake at a time. 

 Seven month everyone. SEVEN months! I can't believe it. Time just needs to sllloowww the heck down. It's been the best seven months of my life though. Really. 

Being married is hard

When I was engaged my parents warned me that being married is more than hard. They told me there would be difficult times and difficult situations that will arise. They counseled with me that it will be hard not to want to call home when feeling discouraged. I listened to their council and advice but I didn’t grasp it fully. How is it THAT hard? It shouldn’t be hard when two people love each other so much. Especially for Paul and I. 

Now that I'm actually married I see these difficult situations are common. Last night as I and my sweet heart held each other tight and cried ourselves to sleep, I thought for the first time.. Marriage is hard. Just like my parents told me. It had been a day full of hard and unexpected events and I finally realized what they had been telling me. Marriage is not hard in a way where Paul and I disagree every moment of the day. Its not hard in the way where we are letting differences over come our love. I just mean that marriage is hard because suddenly, we are now relying on each other to survive in this crazy mess of a world. This means getting and maintaining a good job, getting through school, raising a family.. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t scared.. especially when some of these things just don’t work out for the time being. 

 I asked Paul “why does this crap happen to us? We have the worst luck. The world is seriously out to get us.” Sometimes I don’t think Paul listens very carefully because he usually will sit there quietly after I have  unleashed all my stress and anger and I’m left feeling a bit hopeless with my self pity. But I’ve noticed, he always answers me back. Even if it’s thirty minutes or even an hour after my rant. This time he answered with a very sweet and comforting answer that calmed my soul. He suggested that we look at it in a different light. Every other couple in this world is going through these same challenges and more. We aren't the only ones and to be quite frank, we have it pretty good. Then he said, "we need to go to the temple." I know that being married is hard. It comes with challenges but every obstacle is worth it when my honey and I do it together. 

You say it's your birthday?

It's my birthday too, yeah! 

So, I'm really bad with numbers. As in remembering which number goes to what important fact, person, date, whatever. Last year at this time Paul's birthday was coming up and I for the life of me, could not remember the date. Was it the 10th? 18th? 12th? I felt so embarrassed because at that point in our relationship I should have known at least the date of his birth! Turns out it was the 8th. Thank you Facebook for saving my butt. (seriously, I had to turn to fb to tell me my future husbands birthday.. ugh). 

This year was different though.. I wrote it everywhere so there was no way I couldn't remember my baby's special day. so pathetic. Do you know whats even more pathetic? My manager at work asked me how old Paul was turning.. "umm.. 23. oh no wait I think 22. crap!" See? numbers are dumb. (He was turning 23). 

I absolutely was SO excited for his birthday though. I was determined to make it a good one. 

We woke up at our normal time to get ready for work and school. I told him I would be home a little later in the day because work would be really busy that day (ha lies!). We parted ways, him going to school and me supposedly going to work (did he really think I was going to go to work on his birthday??)  Instead I went to our local and delicious donut bakery to get my baby his favorite treat. I came back to the apartment with a dozen donuts, balloons, cake, lunch, and a wrapped present. I didn't over do it at all. I was so giddy and excited for him to come home that I texted him saying "wow work is really crazy today, wish I was home with you!" When he finally returned, I had a happy birthday sign on the door, some yummy lunch and had our favorite song jammin. He was just too cute walking through that door with that "what the!" look on his face. 

The remainder for the day was full of new ties, ALDO shoes, sushi, popcorn, and cuddling. I think I may have had a better day than Paul! The entire day I kept thinking how lucky I am to get to spend every birthday with this babe. He is absolutely e v e r y t h i n g to me. 

Love quote+My love

“Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two.”

-Louis de Bernières

My darling husband, we are one tree whose roots will continue to knit together eternally.